Sunday, May 25, 2008

Akademi Fantasia 6 Finale.

Its SUNDAY and i have nothing to do. I've no plans, nuthing! I juz received my salary yesterday but there's nuthing exciting that i want to do. I reli dunno what to do. Mite as alwez just keep the money and spend it on something necessary. But..... its very unusual for me this month and i dunno. I decided to keep my money for useful purposes. I will only use it for anything necessary. It was Akademi Fantasia's finale laznite and i think i'm gonna miss it. Been watching it since erm March'08, yea? I dun remember. I've guessed it right and finally STACY got the trophy. I'm proud of her... she's one talented girl and the voters did a right job for voting her. I gotta go to work today coz' of the delayed workload. Its payday on Tuesday and i'm gonna be very busy as alwez.

So anyway, i missed the show laznite coz' i need to fetch Jessica @ 11pm. After that, we dropped by at her place coz' she needs to change before we headed off. We spent the whole nite just cruising around and stopped by at Seri Mama Restaurant. We had supper and den chit chat the whole nite til 3am. We had no idea where to go so we just went cruising around. Reached her place at around 3am. It was nearly 4am when i reach home. W0ke up ard 10am the next morning and it shud've been a beautiful Sunday but unfortunately i have nothing exciting to entertain me. Its been weeks since my boyfriend contacted me and i dun have any idea whether we are still together or not. *sigh* I really don't want to think about it but sometimes i just hafto think of myself, my happiness and my life. I'm really bored rite now and gonna head to office soon and i hope i won't get bored working. SHEESH! Whatever it is, the spice girls are coming and i miss them so much. I'll be seeing them later after work. Ok gotta chow.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Moments of Missing Pieces.

I've changed my layout again. I got bored with the previous layout. Hehehe... I know the blog space is a bit narrow but i like it. It's simple and i called it 'shabby chic' lol. Lame! Talking abt Shabby Chic, I went there few times before and i've alwez like all the art stuffs and stickers. BEAUTIFULL! But... i dunno how to make something 'artful' erks.. is there such words? Haha who cares. Whenever i passed by, i alwez like to see the picture frame designed by Shabby Chic, the birthday invitation, the small poster.. pokoknya.. alllll cantikk banget!!!

Owh, I was browsing to my all blog in multiply.com and how much i was left with memories all those years when i was in Brisbane. How bad i want to be there and meet up with my ex-college mates. How bad i reli wanted to spend my time just enjoying life to the fullest. How bad i want to be in Brisbane to study and enjoying at the same time. How bad i miss my old apartment, my housemate, the place, the people, the beach etc. Everything it says just makes me keep missing Brisbane so much. Its not all about the country but its all abt the memories i had back in 2004. It was i bet the most great experienced living alone not knowing anyone when i first arrived. I was totally lost and alone when i first came to College. I didn't know anyone and lucky i met my sister's friend. He showed me the way to the admin office and there i was sitting all alone waiting to be entertained. I remember i was old-fashioned with the clothes i wore on my 1st day. A guy approached me and asked me which class i'll be in. I gave him my schedule and i was lucky enuff that we went to the same class. I was very happy coz' we came from the same country and he's the only person i can count on at that moment.

I'm gonna share with u guys a bit of my experienced when i first start college. SO anyhow, met my new classmates and most of em' came from different countries around the world. We introduced ourselves and get to know along the way. My brunei fella, Yazid was the one i usually turned to with trouble from understanding my studies. He was very helpful and kind enuff to share. Then, i became close with Sheena and the rest. We used to hangout alot after class and also in the cafeteria. I had many wonderful memories that i will alwez remember. Its just too many for me to share my experienced. I had a very wonderful beautiful housemates feeza during my 2nd semester. I was alwez homesick and had rough long distance r'ship with my exbf. We didn't last long but i'm glad we're still in good terms til' now. We became good friends and move on with our life. I didn't continue my studies up til' Degree and am now working for 2 years. I left a lot of memories behind but it will never be erased from my mind.

I still keep intouch with my friends tho' and I reli miss them so much. Some even still remember our most funny moments and kept reminding me abt those moments when i met them online. Its been 3 years and i'm moving on with my new life but memories stays with me forever. How much i wish i could turn back time but i know its impossible. Its just so wonderful when we could have fun even wen we're working but i tell u... it won't be as fun as when we were still schooling. I had 6 wonderful bestfrens since highschool and Alhamdulillah we're still together up til' now. One is already married and the rest still waiting including me. Hehe.. i wonder who will get married next? YadaYada.. HAHAHA.

There's just tooo much memories i left behind.... How i wish i could capture every moment but i kept it safe in my mind.. Hehehe... This feelings comes every once in a blue moon. Only tonite i feel i'm just missing all the fun i had. Its been awhile since i last enjoy myself... i meant reli2 enjoying. I gez this work is just delaying me from having super super fun! Hmmph.. i dunno if i reli have enjoyments thru out my working life. Well i'm not saying there's no fun at all but i juz dunno what is 'FUN' thru out my time working. I gez i was just very hardworking for these 2 years. As far as i remember the only time i had fun was when i took the 3 days opportunity to Singapore and the rest, i dun reli remember. Having fun with Syg was another different thing. I dun call it fun but i consider it as 'moments with him'. I had several moments with him that i enjoyed and sometimes dull. Dull was the only time when we argued and fought over small things and the rest was just fine. I'm not sure what i'm feeling rite now.. I'm just missing everything missing in my life. *Sigh* But..... No worries..... I know i can cope with life, every obstacles & accepting the fact that life is never easy!

WOAH! It's nearly 2am now.. and i'm dozing off soon. To all my friends who are reading my blog i just wanna say... "I MISS U GUYS SO MUCH". I miss everything i had in my life.. those memories i kept close to my heart and permanently stays in my mind. Being lonely without the presence of my Baby, i just think i will keep missing almost everyone i cherished in life. Without the presence of him taking care of me and to be there when i needed him is juz making me feel unwanted. Without the presence of his beautiful text every single day just meks me feel deeply crushed. I think apart from missing my life, i know i miss him terribly. I gotta end this here for today and sleep. Nite2 people, i love u whoever u are. (with an option tho') LOL, silly me!

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

What's DONE can't be UNDONE.

Yaye my espeed has been activated back. No internet for three days is like no life without water. Hehe.. I'm exaggerating, mind me. Had been purchasing wave card in order for me to survive my boring nite without the internet for the past 3 days. I spent $15 just to get online. See how much desperate i was just to get online. Hehe... Perhaps internet is my bestfren at nite before i go to sleep. It helps me fall to sleep while online for hours. Oh yeah... I couldn't wake up in the morning and so i decided to take my in-lieu. Lucky for me i still have my in-lieu. I was awake all nite watching 'couple or trouble' series til' d end. I juz cudn't make myself sleep coz i was enjoying the series. Plus, i gez too much sleep from the morning til' afternoon meks it hard for me to sleep. I was awake early morning but juz too lazy to stay up. Then i texted my colleagues and told dem dat i will be working in the afternoon. Lucky no one search for me. Hehehe.. I went back to sleep when i finished texting dem. They informed me regarding the visit from HQ but i didn't bother. Juz too tired to come and attend the visit.

Anyhow woke up around 10am, had shower den breakfast. Off to work around 12pm. Stopped by at Ka Umy's room and had a chit chat. I came early coz' i was worried Alimah might get bored and lonely. Seee how nice i can be.. hehehe.. Worked as usual but mentally disturbed yet. The visit was postponed in the morning. In the afternoon, we had a visit from HQ and we had short meetings with all the staffs. We gathered and he gave a spontaneous speech on how he felt regarding the incident that happened. Seriously i felt a bit relieve after the talks and I need to move on with my life. Thats true... this is life.. we need to move on no matter in the most worst scenario happened. Roite?? I'm feeling much much much better now.. and i hope this things won't disturb my mind. I'm enuff with my love life distracting my focus but yet alhamdulillah i managed to control it and i'm still happy with whatever consequences that happened.

I went back home early and not in the mood to stay for overtime. Maybe tomorrow.. =) I was craving for tonsing actually and tats the reason i refused to stay for overtime. I texted Abg Saed and asked him to accompany me to eat tonsing but then G.Amir, G Du & Ka Julie asked me out and accompanied them to buy beads @ Hokko. After that, we went to Mc D and i was starving like hell so i texted Abg Saed and asked him to pick me up afterwards. I was so bored and i needed to go out. Abg Saed came & picked me up. We went cruising all around Bandar, Qlap and Gadong but couldn't make up our mind where to hangout. As we went cruising, i decided to try out at Le'Stadium Restaurant. Met Nurul and Eyoi there. The place is very comfortable and nice. The food was ok and i like it. It'll be our spot for hangout some other time.

We were supposed to meet up with Nasz but he didn't show up. We waited and even left some food for him but in the end, he couldn't come. He didn't even text us... damn scumbag! Hehe... but that's alrite. At least we enjoyed our time looking back at our old pics. HAHAHA.. Love it! Stayed up til' closing time and left around 12am. I drove back home and its been awhile since i last drove a manual car. I must say..im still good at it and i've learned to balance the car. I learnt to balance the car and it was all good. I feel like driving manual again. Anyhow, its getting late and i need me NOT-SO-BEAUTIFUL sleep. One thing made me happy too was that Baby finally miscalled me. Even if its just a miss-call but it made me smile. At least he misses me too. Ok nitey nites.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Unexpected.

Its been 6 days since i last posted. Many things happened for the past few days. As i posted in my last entry regarding the matter i worried abt. The next day after that, i was told the truth. I was shocked and frustrated. I reli don't have the right words to say about what actually happened. I have strange feelings whenever i go to work. I still can't believe these 'things' happened. I didn't even know how to describe it. Since that day onwards, i didn't reli concentrate on my work. I juz couldn't work as enjoy as i was before. Mebe time will make me forget about this and slowly i will start concentrate on my work again.

I'm so bored rite now.. i have been spending the whole day watching korea movie series ' Couple or Trouble'. I also felt so lazy the whole day and fell to sleep. I miss him terribly.. i reli do. I feel so bored when he's not around... i knew i love him and i reli do miss him. I was supposed to go out with licia tonite but then i didn't text her coz' i know she'll be very tired. I have lots of things going on in my mind. I reli dunno how to xplain whats in my heart. Didn't i eva say how much i miss travelling? Well infact i reli do miss travelling. I miss travelling with my family and cousins. I reli want to travel this june that my mom and aunties planned but then i'm not sure whether this is the right time to ask for leave. With this situation, everyone is still feeling shocked and dull.

So anyway, mebe i'll take the courage to ask tomorrow. I wanted to take my inlieu tomorrow morning but then i juz dun feel right. Last Saturday I went to Le'Taj for lunch with Malek, Gsaed, Nasz & Zhaff. I felt much better after all those laughing but then i felt sad again thinking about him. I miss him so much. I don't have the guts to show up in a sudden. Sigh.... Not in the mood to blog much rite now.. I'm so damn bored. Gonna continue watching the korean movie....

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

'Suspicious'

Monday, May 12, 2008

Knock Knock... who's there?

DARN IT! I was just an inch away from office. I walked faster and hoping to reach on time. I realized to my dismay that i was going to be late. As i reached the back door, i quickly keyed in my pin no and rushed in to punch in my card. I was just a minute late which I wish i didn't. Greeted my fellow colleagues and hoping to have a great Monday. It was the same ol' same ol' usual Monday... dull & boring. I stayed up for overtime til' 8pm. I was reli not in da mood. When i was alone at my sit, i was thinking how my life will be in the upcoming years. I realized i've got more commitments towards my adultery life. I don't want to mix up my private life with my work life. I had enough with my relationship which is not even improving much. I dont wana emphasize on that matter. The thoughts of him stress me out. I wish we cud've just settle things in a calm way.

I'm BORED! Its still early.. 10:38pm and i have no idea wat to do besides onlining. I know i need to study on my accounting and exam is around the corner. I need something to ease my mind. I really want to make things better.. i reli do.. i mean it! Why does it has to be very complicated? Oh... lets not talk more about that matter. I received an email today regarding the suicidal of an unknown man. Err.. i was surprised. A man hung himself and was informed tat he commit suicide. Later that afternoon, i heard the news on the radio. I can't believe he commited suicide at an open area. I'm sure someone saw him dying but juz too afraid to make an appeal. Its impossible that no one saw him alive before he hung himself. I juz don't know why he committed such a bad sin. Juz hope his family will keep praying for him to keep his soul calm and forgiven by the Almighty, Amin....! Btw, Its my cousin's birthday today and i've alredi greeted her. I miss her lots and can't wait for her comebacks. My mom and aunties planned to go to Jakarta when my cousins return and she's bringing me along. I hope my leave will be approved. I reli need this vacation. Is there by any chance anyone wants to replace me for a week? Yada Yada.. hehehe.. im off to bed///

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Mothers Day, Love You Mum!

11th March 2008;

Its Mothers Day... and i promised i'll b back to update. I've greeted my mama, aunties and granny. Woke up around 10am today and was trying to fix my dvd player. I'm gonna call up the agent to come and fix my home theatre player. I juz bought it this week and now its not working. STUPID! My family and i celebrated Mothers Day today at Season. Grandma, aunties, uncles and couzies celebrated together with us. Met DJ Ezan at euro classic and had a chit-chat for awhile. I was looking around some things for mama but i cudnt find one. So, went up to Season and met the cousins. We had a great TRUNCH and as usual alwez entertained by the Season's Band. Met quite familiar faces around and i reli enjoyed my time indeed. I wasn't thinking much about my problems coz' i dun wana ruin my day. It was raining heavily as we came out from the basement parking. Haven't bought anything for mama and so my sister and i decided to go to Seri Qlap Mall. Found one nice gift for Mama and 3 shirts for my bro. Treated the lil couzies at the arcade. They were simply enjoying their time and so do i. After tat, they got tired and we headed home. Sent the lil couzies home then back to me home sweet home. Texted baby but there's no reply. *SIGHHHHH*

Overall, no matter how sad i was with my situation but i still enjoyed my time with me families. My cousins will b back around June as wat my Tua told me & they planned to go to Jakarta. I might join them and i'm gonna apply for leave soon. My planned to go travel with Syg will be postponed then. URGHH! I seriously need Shopping Therapy... Before i think about my holiday, i have some errands to be done. I'm tired...Oh anyway, Mama enjoyed her time too and i'm happy she did. Love you mum.. ALWEZ! No one can take this feelings away from me.. you are my everything. My family means everything to me.. Juz can't imagine life without them.

What i want?

For now, all i want is to gain back my happy relationship with sayang. I reli miss him.. I want to make things better even if i dunno how. I want him and i reli missss himm so much. I know i've been repeating that quite a few times. I juz can't help it, i do miss him. I hope he feels the same. And also, I want to go Shopping as satisfy as i wana be. And wat else? erm.. cant think of anything yet.

Oh yeah will b posting some pics when i have free time. Got cute pictures of my lil couzies. Feeling sleepy already... i'm dozing off. Nite2 people.

Lazy Saturday

10th May 2008;

Its been a week since we last contacted each other. I reli miss him. This time we decided to give ourselves a break since things just didnt work out well for the past few days. I can't stand this feelings.. i reli miss him. I hope he felt the same. Anyhow, its weekend & for sure everyone is up for a happening weekend. I didn't have any plans & so i stayed the whole nite at home. He stayed at home too, i gez. I texted him telling him how much i miss him and wanting to solve things out. He said he misses the time when he first met and knew me. He felt that i've changed and dat i didn't care much abt him. I didn't realize that things change. I only realize that he've changed. We totally felt the same and dats the reason i need him to solve things out but he's juz not helping... He kept pushing me away and i'm afraid that this feelings might go away... *SIGH*

I watched TV the whole nite, went online for awhile but i was seriously bored. Licia was too tired to chill out. I was waiting til' 9pm to watch Akademi Fantasia. Still, i miss him! I watched this Malay Drama and its called 'DEMI MASA'. I like the story. You must see it.. its a very catching heart-breaking movie between Mom and Son. I won't elaborate more on that coz' i know you guys probably missed out that drama. It was on TV3 last nite and i slept reli late. I was editting my layout and i decided to change it. I was bored with the previous layout. I hope you guys like my new layout. I got it from kawaichan. So anyway, my mom is alredi dress up while i'm here still blogging in my room. Anyway, i'll be back...


To all Mothers in the world,

Monday, May 5, 2008

Busy, Tired, Fun Day

Friday, May 2, 2008

May aleady?