Where is the feelings that i once felt for him? Sigh....

Sometimes I wonder where does our relationship stands?
Sometimes I wonder why does these feelings changed?
Sometimes I wonder how much do I reli want him or love him?
Sometimes I wonder what do i reli feel for him?

I'm so confused....... *Deep sigh*

But,

There are times when I like him,
There are times when I love him,
There are times when I need him,
There are times when I want him,

and there are times when I just don't need him at all......

I just think that sometimes i'm so stupid for having these uncertain feelings. Am i bad ?! Well.. its not the end yet. I know I do still have that kinda feelings for him and I'm gonna work it out. I don't want to let him know what I am feeling for him rite now. It hurts me for having this uncertain feelings. I got used to not being text anymore, I got used to not being called anymore, I got used to not meeting each other that often, I got used to not hearing those 3 beautiful words and I got used to not being kissed or hugged. But when he was there infront of me doing all those things that I've got used to "not-happening-anymore", I get very upset deep inside & crushed coz' why after these feelings start fading away, he's alwez there to reach up for me?? I'm not sad becoz' I dun have that strong kinda feelings for him but I'm just sad not having that strong feelings for him. You get it?!

Its reli frustrating you know.... Up til' now, I'm still not sure what made our r'ship ruined for the past month. I wanted to ask but I just don't want to bring up the topic coz' I know it mite ruin our time spent together. I'm feeling very dramatic rite now.. I am NOT HAPPY! NOT HAPPY with this situation, not happy with these uncertain feelings, not happy when things turn out sour. I'm even more careful this time for not wanting to ruin the r'ship again. But one thing i know, "I MISS HIM".

OH anyway, its late... I'm off to bed. *sigh sigh sigh*

♥ Mellicious
12:17 AM